And... we're back.

On the upswing. It amazes me how accomplishing the simplest tasks and encourage positive attitude. I guess it shouldn't because it's been a M.O. of mine for a very long time now.

The Battle With the Spiders

Ever see a funnel web spider? Straight out of a horror film, these things. Their legs are so long that they have to to fold them upward to stand or move slowly, but when they decide to take off, all those legs unfold into a hand sized scurrying demonic cluster.

Cassie and I decided to clean and "repair" the garage at the house we rent. It looked to be a pretty gargantuan task. The walls were unfinished at the garage door, leaving the inside space wide open. There was moderate organizing, but the major task was obviously going to be dealing with all of the spiders. It was infested. There were spider webs everywhere. Not the pretty Garden Spider spiderwebs, but the nasty "sleeping bag of death" kind. The web of Funnel Spiders. In no short time, the shop vac was busted out and the high whine of it's motor was a fine accompaniment to sucking the walls and crevices clean. We both felt bad about taking out these beneficial predators, but sometimes a person just has to reclaim space from nature. They can have it back after we move.

In general, it went very well. Cass and I are clear communicators and hard workers. We were able to affect a dramatic change in the garage. We vacuumed all the nooks and crannies (including the space between the front walls) and then I took visqueen and a staple gun and sealed everything in after spraying bug barrier around all potential entries. It looks very nice now and I look forward to having a dry, well lit place to work on vehicles.

At one point, I had asked Cassie to go to the store to get some packing tape (for seaming the walls) and was left alone in the middle of spider battling. This massive spider, easily as big as the tip of my index finger with legs to match, had somehow missed being sucked into the shopvac and was sitting on the floor near the wall. We had taken everything off the shelves and placed it in the center of the garage in order to better access the walls. As soon as I saw the outsized arachnid, it made a break for the pile in the middle. Folks, I'm here to tell ya, I panicked. I could just see this monster insinuating itself into our belongings and spawning more monster spiders to be dealt with later. In my panic, I froze. Yep, good ol' hardcore Jon Plueard, stuck in his tracks at the sight of a spider coming at him at full speed. Did I mention that I was between the pile and the spider? Well, I was.

The interesting thing was that while I was frozen, I was able to have a conversation with myself.

It went something like this:

"Aaaaaaa! It's coming towards me!"

"STOMP IT!"

"YOU'RE NOT STOMPING!"

"Aaaaaaaaaaaa! It's getting CLOSER!"

"YOU'RE GONNA BE TOO LATE!"

"AAAAAAAAAAA! FUCKING STOMP IT, NOW!"

*squish*

Yep, I was able to overcome my panic and stomp that massive fucker just before it went under the tool box and disappeared forever. I did not feel any satisfaction in this killing. It was a big mess. I don't know what that spider had eaten last, but it was all over the garage floor and the bottom of my shoe and it seemed that he had just left the spider version of an all you can eat joint. Maybe an Izzy's. I don't know.

So, upshot? Garage it clean, I feel better and there is one less nightmare inducing spider in the world.