Bicyclists.

Back in the early nineties, my friends and I were Gonzo Mountain Bikers here in Portland. We regularly received criticism from our family and friends for being reckless and rude. We were. Blistering down the middle of Hawthorne, heading downtown to drink and carouse. Blowing off stop signs without missing a pedal stroke, all senses singing to avoid the potential oncoming car. We were tuned and crazy and we knew it. Keep in mind that this was before the huge bike culture explosion in Portland and it was generally risky to ride anywhere but the lower traffic roads. Granted, there were a lot of people who were commuting, but it was nothing like what one can witness on Mississippi Avenue with it's bike "highway" on any given weekday afternoon.

We may have been crazy, but we were wearing helmets, gloves and athletic shoes. We may have been crazy, but we had lights and reflectors and bikes that were up to the task. We may have been crazy, but we wanted to live and while we were risking skin, we knew better than to assume that cars would stop for us or even care that we were there. It was thrilling.

Upon my return to Portland in 2007, I noticed a huge difference between the "old" bike culture and the "new" bike culture. I thought perhaps that it was just a few folks that I was seeing, but over time I noticed that it was a general approach to cycling in the city. Entitlement. Plain and simple. People on bicycles disregarding the rules of the road not in a "Gonzo" way, but in a mundane "I belong here" way.

Whereas my friends and I would blow off stop signs while standing on the pedals and scanning left and right, it is not remarkable to witness a 30 something young professional on a hip city bike roll a stop sign with nary a glance left or right.  Listen, I have no investment in what you do with your time here on Earth. I could not care less. But when your choices turn into very real threats to my well being, well...

A week ago Friday a young man on a vintage white fixie blew a stop sign while wearing ear buds with no light. Unfortunately for him, I was crossing the intersection on a wonderful 1978 Honda 350. Fortunately for us both, I am a Gonzo rider who can deal with the little surprises that traffic throws at me. You should have seen his face. His mouth and eyes were equally sized "O's". As I fishtailed to a stop, he quickly disappeared into the night, surely fleeing a tongue lashing. I was pissed. But, c'est la vie, life is
too short to hold on to trivial anger. It was then that I started thinking about the differences in the bike culture that I was noticing.

So, here it is. If you are on a bicycle on an inappropriate street, say Hawthorne, east of 12th, you are an idiot and you deserve injury or death. If you are on a bicycle and you choose to run a stop sign and you get smacked by a car because you weren't paying attention, you deserve injury or death. If you are on a bicycle and you have no helmet, gloves or shoes that are durable and you are injured to a further extent because of your bad choices, well...

What's more, if you decide to do any of these things while I am on two wheels (I won't do it in a car) and in your presence, you will become aware of me in short order. No more social niceties when you cut me off, block my path of travel or are generally douche-like. It may not be my job to correct your behavior, but you will know that you are disagreed with. And maybe you'll adjust your behavior. Like. "Wow, that scooterist just came within half a foot of me, perhaps I should stop riding in the middle of a four lane, thirty-five mile an hour speed limit road like it was a sidewalk!" But, that's probably just wishful thinking.